We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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