my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Blood and glitter go together right?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
