I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
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