This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
