Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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