I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Randomize
