Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
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i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
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But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner