Texts From Last Night

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  (845): View more from New York

  maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night

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  (845): maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night http://tfl.nu/d95d
  Replies (12) Good night (934) Bad night (2852)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I'm on my period, period, period

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  (540): birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex (703): I'm on my period, period, period http://tfl.nu/vsrk
  Replies (72) Good night (1873) Bad night (15781)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.

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  (+44): Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint. http://tfl.nu/r0bi
  Replies (25) Good night (5783) Bad night (2857)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.

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  (407): Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents. http://tfl.nu/8i9e
  Replies (12) Good night (842) Bad night (2916)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.

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  (416): sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you. http://tfl.nu/2uqq
  Replies (16) Good night (3885) Bad night (2435)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.

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  (815): Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool. http://tfl.nu/9aum
  Replies (12) Good night (3136) Bad night (994)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"

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  (918): this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun" http://tfl.nu/d07w
  Replies (16) Good night (3629) Bad night (1073)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.

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  (519): You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone. http://tfl.nu/p7fo
  Replies (3) Good night (1342) Bad night (616)
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.

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  (229): He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam. http://tfl.nu/61az
  Replies (1) Good night (921) Bad night (1567)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.

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  (207): I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine.... (617): This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs. http://tfl.nu/5fub
  Replies (12) Good night (2984) Bad night (822)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.

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  (812): We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested. http://tfl.nu/f61h
  Replies (3) Good night (993) Bad night (365)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.

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  (203): Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic. http://tfl.nu/uabe
  Replies (2) Good night (1117) Bad night (621)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god

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  (314): Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god http://tfl.nu/tl6y
  Replies (12) Good night (1104) Bad night (338)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot

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  (301): The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot http://tfl.nu/zrh0
  Replies (0) Good night (590) Bad night (306)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.

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  (847): I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text. http://tfl.nu/zkwg
  Replies (6) Good night (532) Bad night (226)

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