Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
