I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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