3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
