***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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