Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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