Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
