Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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