Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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