dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
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