we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
