Duck Duck Cougar?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize