I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
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