She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize