I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize