You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
