THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
barbara walters just said penis...
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
