i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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