Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
