Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
