what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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