You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
