is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
