My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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