Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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