Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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