Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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