i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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