a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
