Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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