I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
