So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
