go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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