i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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