wrigley field is MILF paradise
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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