Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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