The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
kristin has been a bad kristin
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
