absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize