Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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