do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
