I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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