Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
