If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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