Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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