You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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