she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I got inside last night via doggy door
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
